Wait.

No, I am not going to add in another heart wrenching entry. The table has turned, finally. Just ought to spice things up a little in my mundane wordpress. Everything has always been about this sadist alienated  Fhy and I just realised how many people went in and out of my humble centre of thoughts. And these people know how wrenched my heart is. Ahh, fuck it.

Just thought I should share something cool here. Although it’s not time yet, but still. Bike license, beat that women!

Sensational piano, mesmerzing violin and sounds of the country guitar just made me feel so special. Imagine life without knowing how beautiful music is when scrape and pieces of them were to be placed together. I wonder how much those unfortunate deaf people are missing out. Something random for you.

What.

I have been sounding like the biggest loser on earth in my wordpress, I know. And I looked different outside if you bumped into me like how I bumped into random people I know couple of hours ago at Orchard Road. I won’t be dressing like a woman who just lost her job and went through a broken marriage, disheveled. To wordpress is where I bare my heart out into words but beautifully rephrased. Jyeah, those who know me well, will know me well. What the bullshit am I typing about?

Sorry.

I gave it a thought before doing this. I set all of my links on private mode. Which means it’s only down to me, the author who can see those links. Therefore, I  did not unlinked all of you. It’s just that I changed its setting into a private mode.  ‘Cos I think my links list is way too long. Well, for me.  All on private mode. Fair and square. If you are angry that I  changed the settings, please don’t. I am a good girl.

Lie.

I still wonder why I let you affect me so much, emotionally indirectly bringing me down. Now my life evolves around deceits and lies from those whom I trusted. Bloody hell, living in self-denial isn’t an easy feat. Just tell me something, why?

On a lighter note, Japan is calling on my course-mates (including me) to go on an overseas study trip to their country. Think of the fun and excitement we’ll have there. 6 days 5 nights will be awesome. Last day of exams will be on 5 March 2010. We’ll be flying off at 6 March 2010. Cool, I know. But (there’s always a ‘but’ in my case), it’s a fucking $2130. Where on earth am I supposed to dig up moolahs from? Verdict? Denied by momma yet and AGAIN. It’s always like this when it comes to overseas trip. ALWAYS. See? My life is always never far from the word pathetic. Treasure yours.

Selamat Hari Raya Haji. I am in no mood to celebrate.

Wisdom.

Recently, I’ve been overwhelmed with despair as I’ve come to understand that not only do I currently have very little in my life to feel ecstatic about but, with the exception of hoping that I will grow taller. This is it for me. I just want to paint a fair picture, that’s all. Despite all of the heaps of shits I’ve been through, I am … still pathetically the same. I really wish I wouldn’t have to live another day of saying,”I should have….”. Regrets. Oh shut up , Fhy. This didn’t use to bother me. Frankly, it’s depressing. At least I’m still alive and kicking. Wow, I’m impressed, really.

Kite.

Your children is not a colouring book. They sometimes don’t look good in the colours you put on. I am not a colouring. Hear that? The ask yourself, are you a colouring book? If not, screw the saying that goes,”Children are like a brand new white canvas. They take in colours you put on them.”

Mugging.

Fhy: Ma, can I stay out late tomorrow?

Mama: What for?

Fhy: Mug lah. What else can I do at this point of time.

Mama: Okay, go lah. But don’t let me catch you doing things you shouldn’t be doing.

Fhy: Come ahhh. Sit beside me in library. Or stalk me where ever I go to. I challenge you.

Mama: Now don’t you challenge me lady. I can yknw.

Fhy: Bring it on, mama.

Mama: (went out of my room)

Come on mama, I am challenging you to a stalking showdown!